A creature's body contorting beyond recognition beneath your hand, is what I saw.

[ There could be disgust in those words; odder perhaps that Ilias's voice is entirely devoid of it. That even poised on the edge of chain-smoking himself into an early grave, he can talk about the active mutilation of a living being like they're discussing a painting in a gallery. That he can't talk about it any other way. ]

I am not asking if it can be used in self-defense. [ He was fighting an ogre; they were losing a war. ] I am asking why that is the skill you chose to develop.

[ If there was a preexisting fascination. For example. ]